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The Easy Path Project Live Stream #20
Strategic Wingman Intelligence – How I evaluated my dating students
Welcome to another Easy Path Project live stream. Tonight’s discussion is a powerful one: why most wingmen fail their friends and the tactical observation system that changes everything.
In the past, I worked with a lot of older men—guys who had never dated or had any kind of social success. Starting from the ground up, I found that their struggles were actually fairly easy to handle when they were acknowledged and released, which is why I’m always encouraging you to address your challenges now. Don’t end up in your 50s or 60s still suffering from problems from childhood or young adulthood—fix those things today!
But here’s the question: what if you could see exactly what holds you back in social situations? Could a simple shift in focus transform your social life overnight?
By the end of this live stream, I’ll give you things to think about—insights I gained out in the field—to help you eliminate the leaks in your confidence before they sabotage your interactions. This creates a magnetic presence that draws people toward you. A core principle: if you make yourself charming and attractive, the sort of person others want to be around, everything gets easier.
When you follow what I’m sharing tonight, you’ll understand how to avoid those confidence blows that can set you back. Simply by trying, you’re already ahead of most people who never attempt anything new. Don’t let a setback convince you otherwise.
Two Powerful Lenses: Imagine and Explore
Tonight’s talk is based on my field notes, which I realized could be viewed through two different lenses. The “Imagine” lens is about the deeper, hypnotic dream-state themes—the thoughts rooted deeply in your mind. The “Explore” lens focuses on a more intuitive, emotional aspect—the “woo,” the touchy-feely elements that still matter.
Both ways of viewing things are important. If you use them together, you’ll start to see yourself, your friends, and others in a totally different light. Even if this sounds almost fantastical, I promise you, the “map” I’m sharing is very real.
Weekly Live Streams and the Journey So Far
I’m live every weekday night around 7:30 p.m. Central, and there’s a live stream playlist if you want to catch up. Tonight marks the end of my fourth week of streaming. Up to now, we’ve laid the groundwork. From here on, I’ll be giving you real, practical applications you can use right away.
It’s important not to wait until you’re “perfect” to act. Go out now, even as you work on yourself, because real change often happens through taking action. Steve Pavlina refers to the signals you get from life as “pings from the universe”—little nudges indicating when you’re on the right path. This kind of feedback helps you navigate, whether you call it intuition or just reading your own experience.
Observing in the Field: Real-World Social Skills
When I took these men out into social environments—whether festivals, farmers’ markets, or city streets—we’d simply walk around, interact, and look for opportunities to connect with people. Repetition is key; the more you socialize, the more comfortable you become.
Here’s what I looked for when assessing social confidence and ability:
1. Observable Signs of Anxiety or Internal Turmoil
I watched for physical signs: fidgeting, a strained voice, excessive blinking. These reflect inner tension that can warp your perception of reality. You can often tell by someone’s body language and demeanor how they’re feeling. It’s tough to attract people if you appear anxious or inwardly stressed.
If I noticed my guy feeling out of place, we’d pause and talk—it’s not a race. The goal was to make him comfortable with social interaction, not to prove anything.
2. External Focus Versus Being Stuck in Your Head
I observed whether the person was truly focused on those around him or caught up in his own worries and catastrophic thinking. If you’re always in your head, you miss what’s happening outside. Remember, the other person is focused on themselves too; for strong connections, balance your attention between yourself and others.
3. Eye Contact and Nonverbal Communication
I paid attention to eye contact—was it relaxed and comfortable, or did he avoid it? So much human communication is nonverbal; body language and the eyes play crucial roles. Many men who struggle socially haven’t learned to project confident, welcoming body language. Instead of trying to fake it, focus on cultivating genuine positive feelings about yourself.
When you feel good and look people in the eye—whether it’s women, teachers, bosses, or friends—you build rapport and become instantly more approachable. Even just smiling and making casual eye contact with everyone creates openness and charm.
4. Body Language of Confidence and Self-Respect
I examined posture and movement: shoulders back, head up, chin slightly elevated. Does he move comfortably and exude poise, or does he appear hunched and withdrawn? Holding yourself up straight communicates self-respect, inspires confidence in others, and can transform how people react to you.
Presentation matters, just like dressing well, grooming, and caring for yourself. You’re signaling to the world that you value yourself, and that positive energy reverberates.
5. Approach and Social Initiative
I looked for signs of initiative: does he approach people, or does he hesitate and remain passive? You don’t have to be great at cold approaches—just being open and cheerful gets people interested in you. Even if someone hasn’t shown interest first, there are ways to initiate conversation using common ground such as a shared interest. The important thing is to try rather than withdraw.
6. Conversation Skills and Rapport Building
I assessed his ability to engage in back-and-forth conversation: does he listen and respond, or does he dominate or struggle to speak? Many “smart boys” make the mistake of turning conversations into monologues, which kills connection. On the other hand, some men are so nervous they can barely talk.
A crucial skill is listening carefully and then asking relevant questions based on what was just said. Genuine interest is a powerful connector. If you want someone to like you, especially a woman, be authentically curious and attentive.
7. Pacing and Leading: Subtle Connection Techniques
This is a more nuanced aspect, and I learned it through the lens of hypnotic suggestion. “Pacing” means acknowledging and matching the other person’s current reality. For example, in a crowded coffee shop, saying, “It’s busy in here today,” shows you’re observing the shared environment. Once rapport is established, you can gently “lead” by making suggestions, such as inviting someone to join you at a table. This method moves the interaction naturally without force.
8. Reaction to Setbacks
I observed how a man handled setbacks or rejection. Did he become angry, retreat, or let a negative experience shape his self-image? Confidence means learning from what doesn’t work without internalizing it as failure. Don’t let a momentary “no” define your worth or predict your future success.
You can even find humor in awkward situations. In my experience, going out with friends and turning setbacks into a lighthearted competition was fun and helped everyone build resilience.
9. Avoiding Desperation and Approval-Seeking
Desperation and a need for validation are major turn-offs. This includes giving unearned attention or trying to “earn” love or attraction by doing things for someone, expecting reciprocity. That’s classic friend zone behavior and comes from a place of neediness rather than genuine self-worth.
If you learned as a child that you had to “earn” love, it’s time to let go of that belief. It’s just an old, unhelpful memory. When you drop it, you’ll stop seeking approval from women and start interacting from a place of authenticity and confidence.
10. Expressing Genuine Interest and Sharing Values
There are two parts to this: First, show genuine curiosity and interest in others. Listen attentively and ask thoughtful follow-up questions. Don’t focus on trying to impress—what truly impresses is being fully present and engaged.
Second, can you clearly articulate your own values? Are you able to stand up for what matters to you, even when it’s not convenient? This is what I call “moral courage.” Being able to say what you believe and stand by it is extremely attractive—not just physically strong, but strong in character. When you combine genuine curiosity about others with a clear sense of your own values, you’ll naturally find common ground for connection.
Putting It All Together
If you observe yourself and notice these areas as you interact with others—whether you’re practicing in real life or simply reflecting on your day—you become your own best guide. Stepping back and watching your actions helps you self-correct and grow.
If you found this helpful, please leave a like and a comment. I genuinely enjoy chatting with people, and your insights and feedback let me know I’m on the right track. If you know someone who might benefit, share this post or the channel with them.
If you’re skeptical or want to challenge something I’ve shared, feel free to push back in the comments. I’m confident in what I’m teaching, but I’m always open to hearing new perspectives and exploring nuances.
If you like these live streams, subscribe and click the notification bell so you never miss one. Your best wingman is someone who provides real-time feedback and helps keep your head in the game—but even if you don’t have that friend, you can always take on that role for yourself.
Even just thinking about these things can start to shift your experience. Be open to the possibility that things can improve—and you might find your social life changing in ways you never expected.
On our next stream, we’ll be looking at all of this through the “explore” lens—a more intuitive, emotional perspective. I think you’ll get a lot out of approaching the topic from both angles, so don’t miss it.
Thank you for joining tonight. I hope I’ve given you something to reflect on, and I look forward to seeing you at our next live stream. Remember, you can always catch up on previous streams through our playlist. Come back each weeknight at 7:30 p.m. Central, and let’s keep learning how to live our most confident lives.
Take it easy!